You May Thunk Now
by Todd's Pet
Summary: Humorous I hope and irreverant - my take on what Todd, Steve and Kenny might think of their thunkers!


**You May Thunk Now**

**Just a bit of fun – here's my take on what Todd, Steve and Kenny might think of their thunkers…**

Very early one morning Todd, Steve and Kenny beam into a quiet office somewhere on Earth. The only woman there has just sat down with her first-thing coffee in front of her Wraith slideshow screensaver.

"Hey! Where did you come from?" she jumps out of her chair in surprise and simply can't believe her eyes. "Oh my - you're Kenny! Oh, and Todd… and, oh my God, you're Steve…"

"You have an image of me on your computer screen," Todd observes.

"Yes, that's my wallpaper…"

"You have covered your computer screen with wallpaper…?" Steve asks.

"Well, no… oh, it's complicated…"

"Oh, look! She has one of me, too!" Kenny says excitedly.

"Yes, that's my screen saver – I have all the Wraith on my screen saver," she says.

"It must be a very big screen," says Steve, looking around the back of it.

"You are a member of my thunk thread, are you not?" Todd asks the woman.

"Em… how on earth did you…?"

"We have been monitoring communications on this planet," Kenny says enthusiastically.

"Are you worshippers?" asks Steve.

"Well, no, not really…"

"Play your cards right, human, and I might allow you to worship me," says Steve, looking the woman up and down.

"_**I**_ decide who worships who on my hive," Todd growls.

Steve pouts prettily, then preens and says, "I have my own thunk thread, you know."

Todd corrects him. "Yes, but it died months ago. The human females are no longer interested in you."

"If they knew I was still alive they'd be there in their thousands," Steve protests.

"Well, they don't, so they thunk me now," states Todd grumpily.

"I have my own thunk thread now, too, Commander," Kenny pipes up. "It's only been going a few days and I have 4 pages already."

"Mine has 145 pages…" Todd knocks him back.

"Commander, I know how to make a human female thunk," Steve butts in with confidence.

"Very well - demonstrate," Todd commands.

Steve grabs the startled woman by the wrist and pulls her close to him, so close they have full frontal body contact. He's warm, very warm. His golden eyes are dancing and glittering with mischief and the woman blushes deeply.

"Has she thunked yet?" Kenny asks.

"Not yet," Steve replies, irritated at the interruption.

Taking a deep breath Steve plants his lips firmly on hers. Nice, she thinks, but he's clearly either never done this before or he's very much out of practice. Just as she's thinking this she gets a funny sensation in her head then Steve sweeps her backwards into a classic passionate clinch and suddenly becomes a much better kisser. _Telepathy?_ The woman thinks, _That is so not fair!_

Steve suddenly stands upright, dropping her to the floor as he does so, and stands there, smoothing his hair down and grinning.

"Was _that_ a thunk, Commander?" Kenny asks again.

"Well, no, actually – I'm only on the floor because he just dropped me," the woman says, rubbing her bruised elbow.

"Apologise," Todd demands of Steve.

"To a human?" Steve looks aghast.

"Apologise!"

Steve pouts and mumbles reluctantly, "I'm sorry I dropped you."

"Let me try," Todd volunteers. He gallantly helps her up from the floor, nodding his head slightly as if bowing respectfully. Good start, she thinks. Unlike Steve's complete lack of preamble, Todd leans in close as he takes her gently into his arms and allows his warm breathe to caress her cheek. He reaches out and strokes her hair, tucking it behind her ear with one elegantly clawed finger. She feels her knees start to tremble. He brushes her lips with his ever so briefly and she just can't help herself - she faints in his arms!

"I believe _that_ is what you call a thunk," says Todd triumphantly.

"Can _I _try it now, Commander?" asks Kenny.

**-oOo-**

"So basically, you're here to test the lie of the land and see if we're all up for it?" the woman asks.

She's now sitting in the store room with all three Wraith. She's made them all strong coffee and while her own is half drunk, Todd has merely sipped his politely once or twice, while Steve holds his as far away as he can as if it were toxic and Kenny keeps dipping his finger in his and then licking his finger curiously.

"There are more than enough humans to go round on this planet – we don't have to feed on them all," says Todd. "So it seems reasonable that if there are lots of human females who are willing to…" Todd tails off and the woman is sure she can see a hint of pink flush his green cheeks.

"But _you_ wouldn't want that," Kenny pokes his coffee stained finger in Steve's ribs, "After all, they're just humans!"

Steve ponders this a second but says, "Well, it would certainly be a whole lot better than waiting a millennium for some snooty-nosed Queen to decide she wants to mate."

"And we wouldn't have to use up all our energy converting worshippers," Kenny adds.

"Yes, it would certainly be more energy efficient," Todd muses, openly appraising the human female. "So do you think there would be more like you who would be willing to come to Pegasus with us?"

"Oh, I'm certain of it," she says, "Just let me throw some stuff in a suitcase and send a message to my friends."

"Excellent," says Todd, standing up and putting the cold cup of coffee aside gratefully. "And I also have a message to send while you do so."

**-oOo-**

"Send a sub-space message to all the hives," Todd tells Steve, "Message as follows: Meet here at noon tomorrow – link to earth co-ordinates - easy earth women plus all you can eat buffet – come and get it!"

Meanwhile the human female sits in the hive with her laptop and posts the following message on the Wraith Defenders Forum: Meet here at noon tomorrow – link to hive coordinates - easy Wraith males, all you can handle – come and get 'em, girls!


End file.
